Resolving Interpersonal Conflict

 A Generation vs Generation Approach

 

Interpersonal conflict between people is a fact of life. In almost any aspect of our life, there is bound to be a situation where we develop negative relationship toward a certain individual due to different perspective. Interpersonal conflict is complicated, there is no hard and fast recipe as in how we should prevent or handle it. Often, the conflict arises when two parties is unable to come to a state of understanding towards the other individual’s point of view.

 

Let me take you through a case of interpersonal conflict that I was involved in that occur mainly due to the different work ethics between two individual of a different generation.

This incident took place in an annual collaborated event with one of Singapore’s most prominent magazine that I was involved in.

This event is held annually to commemorate the magazine’s achievement as well as a gathering for the loyal readers of the magazine.  A series of activity were lined-up for all those who participate. Honorably, we are the representing studio for the event providing complimentary photo-shoot which might entitle the participant to have chance to be the next cover model for the magazine. This event attracted huge amount of clients and thus the efficiency of the staff is crucial. You may have seen such event being held in shopping mall when you are doing your shopping spree.

 

 

Now, let me briefly introduce the “players” of this conflict

Uncle B, a 55 year old, full-time veteran photographer who is in the line of photography over 30 years. Though there is an age difference between us, we shared a really good relationship. He is like a mentor to me who is ever willing to impart his valuable photography skill to me. I truly appreciate and am honored to have him in my organization. Uncle B is usually stationed at the studio to do indoor shoot. However this time round, I requested for him to assist in this outdoor event.

Partner A, a 27 year old, ad-hoc and regular event helper who have been assisting me in many road-shows for the past one year. She has been a good assistant to me and I have to say she is indeed proficient in managing outdoor event and is always quick on her feet when a problem arises.

Together with a group of part-timers with Uncle B and Partner A, I conducted the usual event briefing and off we go to “rock” the event!

 

Things seem perfect isn’t it?  

With the assistance from these two reliable helpers, how can the event not be a success?

 

 

But I was wrong…

 

 

On the first day of the event, all the set-up went smoothly and everyone seem to be working well together. It was indeed pleasing to see everyone working well together in achieving the same goal. By the way, Uncle B was the first photographer doing the shoot for the event, while Partner A assisted in the running of the booth.

As the event begun, clients started streaming to the booth and before we know, the mall was full of clients wanting to do their photo-shoot. Our booth was running smoothly and all clients were delighted and excited to receive their individual photo (what we known as portfolio-shot). I have to say everyone was doing a splendid job.

After ensuring everything was running in order, I linked up with the magazine organizer to attend a meeting.

During my meeting, I received numerous calls from Partner A. As I was unable to answer her call, I received a text from her:

Not expecting the problem to be so serious, I made my way slowly back to the booth. 

 

This is how it goes…

 

Upon reaching the crowded booth, Partner A immediately dragged me to a corner while Uncle B was still diligently doing his job. Partner A exclaimed to me in unhappiness and advised me to instruct Uncle B that his method of photographing is hogging up the entire event. She explained to me that a lot of clients are actually unhappy about having to wait so long as Uncle B was taking a fairly long time to do the shoot for each and every customer. She informed me that she has voiced the concern to Uncle B but was being ignored.

 

At that point of time, I was actually quite concerned about the unhappiness between them as I could literally feel the fire in Partner A. Having working with her for so long, that was the first time I saw her flared up.

 

Indeed the queue was getting longer and I do understand the concern from the perspective of Partner A. I calmed her down and ask her to proceed with her job.

After which, I returned to the photo-booth area and viewed the actual situation.

True enough, Uncle B might be taking a longer time than it should be to complete an individual shoot. However, I must admit that the quality of the photo was awesome and can be comparable to a studio shoot.

Unfortunately, due to the high volume of client at the event, it might not be too ideal to do this unlike when the shoot is being done in the studio.

 

Trying to be as natural as I can be, I jokingly instructed my other photographer to take over the photography job temporarily so that Uncle B could take a break since he have been shooting continuously for a few hours.

As usual, I jocularly asked Uncle B if he was tired and invited him to have a coffee with me in hoping to cease his tension from the hectic job.

He agreed.

At our coffee session…

Apparently, I felt that Uncle B already knew that Partner A had informed me about her concern and he is feeling really unhappy about it.

 

This is what he say, “Those young people, they just do things the way they feel it is supposed to be! What do they know about photography? Does one simply become a photographer when they hold a camera? So unprofessional, how will they even succeed in life? Disrespectful and arrogant bunch of people! And they expect me to listen to them?”

Uncle B continued to tell me how he felt about the inappropriate quality of service Partner A delivered to our clients as well as how rude she was when she spoke to him.

 

As I try to calm him down, I also took the opportunity to explain to him the different working style Partner A adopts as well as letting him know why I always emphasized that studio and event shoot are different. At the same time, I also let him know that I personally do not agree with Partner A being rude to him and will speak to her about it, hoping that he can understand that Partner A did not did it on purpose.

 

At that particular moment, I know both of them are no longer on talking terms and having them to work together is as good as making things worst and destroying the event.

Knowing the good relationship I have with Uncle B, I casually suggested to him if he is willing to return to the studio to assist while I will take care of the issue here. I understand that by doing so, I may actually hurt his pride but this might be the best alternative after all at that moment.

 

He agreed and left the event after our coffee.

The event continues to run and ended smoothly.

My thoughts…

I felt that the main cause of this conflict is largely due to the different perspective from the two different generations of people. Uncle B being the “baby boomer generation” takes pride in his work, wanting to deliver high quality products to the client regardless of the hassle. On the other hand, Partner A being in the generation Y has her own style of working and want things to be accomplished efficiently in the fast phase setting.

 

Well, the fault really doesn’t lies solely on any one party.

 

From my perspective, I do agree that Partner A is managing the event as per how it is supposed to be. However, especially in our Asian context, being respectful is a very important aspect in the society especially being respectful towards an elder. It may be difficult to convey the message across to an elder especially if you are trying to critique his working style. However, I believe that if we being the younger generation are able to take a step back and think how we should approach them sensitively, things may not be so undesirable after all.

 

The two generation has grown up in a very different world and this affects our expectations and approaches to interpersonal conflict.

 

Many a time, we are not able to choose who we want to work with and often we will have to work with people who have a completely different perspective from us. The rise of conflict is almost unavoidable if no party is willing to compromise. I believe good communication skill is essential in term of preventing and resolving the conflict. The type of communication skills we choose to adapt plays an important part in the final consequence of the conflict.

Even though the event went on smoothly, Uncle B is unwilling to attend the post-party celebration of the event since Partner A will be around.
Did I handle the situation inappropriately by suggesting Uncle B to return to the studio that might actually hurt his pride? How will you handle this situation if you were me at that moment of time when you really needed to place a high priority in ensuring that the event continues to run successfully?

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An insightful video on how to resolve a interpersonal conflict... Useful tips... Enjoy...



 

 

Signing off...